Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse

Spine-tinglingly sensational cinematic experience weaves a wonderful alternate world where ground-breaking arachnimation, comic comedy, and philosophical depth can co-exist simultaneously, and even as the brilliantly genre-bending cast of characters struggle to thwart trans-dimensional fusion they introduce our less-advanced reality to futuristic concepts like… genuine diversity, moral ambiguity, and increased spider-sensitivity.

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Adaptation.

Writing fifty words about Adaptation.  Could be difficult.  Would have to be introspective and witty.  Cleverly self-referential perhaps.  Can’t employ Kaufman’s witty plot-structure.  Must handle subjective abstract concept in concrete form.  But that would be a boring review indeed.  No.  Brilliant editing! Ingeniously crafted!  Streep, Cooper, Cage and especially Cage!

Season of the Witch

Nicholas escorts caged girl through mountains in this confused horror-fantasy, Kingdom of Constantine, should have been straight to DVD, movie-thing. A crusade of genre regulars like Thomsen and Perlman can’t carry this heavy load across the bridge of poor writing. Ultimately a foolish but fun looks at Cage’s career’s afterlife.

Leaving Las Vegas

Nicholas drinks himself out of his quirky Cage and into an incredible performance and perverse relationship with Elisabeth Shue gone wild at heart. Figgis’ most mainstream film and best character study is an almost impressively bleak downward spiral that somehow feels uplifting and sweet. Despite seriousness, begs for drinking game.

The Sorcerer's Apprentice

Disney turns random Fantasia segment into better Percy Jackson. Cage’s quirkiness perfectly fits his magical mentor for Baruchel’s nasal nerd while ample effects make the show enjoyable. Implausible romance, completely unintimidating bad guys, and Pirates style random rule invention prevent this film from being anything other than a kid’s flick.

Drive Angry

More like, Driven Mad. Rodriguez-esque self-aware B film accidentally recreates worst parts of the genre. Cage under-overacts but Heard acts gorgeous and almost distracts from disasterous film. Fichtner’s highlight performance can’t make up for the horrible effects. No plotholes, but rather an angry plot abyss with occasional islands of solidity.

Kick-Ass

Watchmen’s Zombieland with matching angsty, redundant voiceover. Bright colors and cleverly Layer-Caked transitions add nice touch to poorly paced but generally enjoyable film. Nick Cage perfectly paired with best female superhero yet, and their violence is beautiful to behold. Features hallway fight to rival Oldboy but done by young girl.

Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call - New Orleans

Herzog fills radical revision and substantial improvement of Ferrara’s drug-fest with quirkiest cast ever to not feature Ben Stiller. Kilmer and Cage are uncharacteristically good, reminding us that they are not action heroes. Mendes reprises role as Ghost Rider’s girlfriend and supporting cast provide excellent support. Especially those elusive iguanas.