Beauty and the Beast (2017)

Elitist Hermione follows her hobbit father into a slightly less animated re-imagined adventure. Book-smarts bring beastiality to beauty’s brain, playing perfectly into Princely prick’s quest to pursue a tail as young as possible. Meanwhile no one sings like Gaston, though Gad spells disastter in Evans’ efforts to ring a Belle.

Brave

How to Train your Mother Bear feels like Pixar emulating Disney instead of sticking to their own creative originality.  Beautiful animation can’t save red-head Tangled from poor plotting, predictable action, and an underwhelming conclusion.  Amusing but unimportant dialogue, clichéd witch spells and lack of heart ensure this dream doesn’t work.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2

Happy Potter and the Octilogy ending battle. Final chapter is far-cry from blue-balled predecessor. Kill Voldemort vol. 2 leaves all the apparating behind and focuses instead on hurling digital fire back and forth. Brief stop by the Matrix weapons room precedes Aslan Potter saving the day. Then poof, aging spell.

Sense and Sensibility

Trelawney gets a Grant with self-scripted role while she sticks Winslet with Snape, who finally gets to be a good guy. Meanwhile House makes a home with Umbrage, and everyone struggles to express themselves through bookish British dialogue. Released in China under alternative title: Crouching Sense, Hidden Sensibility. Jolly good.

Love Actually

Sprawling romantic comedy set on the corner of Magnolia and Notting Hill. Basically a fictionalized account of every single person in England on and around Christmas. Beautiful editing and writing create sublime mix of sincere sadness and hilarity. Easier to name British actors excluded rather than included. Uh… John Cleese?

An Education

Sarsgaard resumes his frequent creepy guy role, this time enhanced by being convincingly British and in pursuit of impressively talented Carey Mulligan. A peppering of bigger stars in smaller roles support the story excellently, and beautifully written, witty dialogue prevents an otherwise endearing script from becoming too clichéd or preachy.

Dead Again

Branagh makes sincere effort to be Hitchcock and fails miserably. Tolerable acting unable to save film from countless failed attempts at suspense. Third act plot twist seems clever compared to rest of film. Saving graces include quirky bit performance by Robin Williams and intensely comedic age makeup on Andy Garcia.