Monday, June 6, 2016

Crimson Peak


Peak marks Del Toro’s all time low, sinking even deeper than its Pacific predecessor.  Hiddleston steals the show as he struggles between the chaste and the Chastain.  Meanwhile Mia navigates fifty shades of red with guidance by visually spectacular specters who do nothing for the narrative. A big bloody mess.

Thursday, June 2, 2016

Pan


Joe gets it Wrong again as neither Oz Luhrman spectacle, Peter’s les miserable backstory, or even Captain Jackman Sparrow can lift this cumbersome shipwreck into the Neverland of enjoyable storytelling.  John Wayne Hook and White Tiger Lily further encumber this fairly tall fairy tale that just can’t seem to fly.

Monday, May 30, 2016

10 Cloverfield Lane


Refuses to lock itself in with rules, and therefore avoids breaking any.  What could have been a claustrophobic chamber-piece has plenty of breathing room thanks to solid cinematography and performances that make it all good, man.   Peculiar franchise allusion and suspiciously spoiler-esque title make Signs 2 all the more surprising.