The Princess and the Frog

Disney returns to hand-drawn animation roots with their best story in recent years. Songs are relatively forgettable, but the character’s, comedy, and title-defeating un-princess-like moral message are not. Waxes a bit too terrifying at points, and maybe a tad stereotypical towards New Orleans, but Song of the South it isn’t.

The Informant!

Matt Damon takes a fantastically serious comedic turn in a quirky true-story crime conspiracy. Sodherberg uses his main character’s mind to take the film back to Schizopolis, and for once voiceover works beautifully. Periodically difficult to associate with main character and hard to understand plot, but then, that’s the point.

Thirst

Oldboy director hops onto the vampire bandwagon but misses the memo that the plots are supposed to be terrible. Instead he satisfies every question that Interview left open while providing a visually incredible and simultaneously scary and funny film. Furthermore, injects transfusion of equal parts philosophical query and cinematic mastery.

Poseidon

Most satisfactory remake since the original Adventure. Das Perfect Boot director navigates familiar waters and follows original plot loyally but redefines characters in creative and satisfactory way. Russell performs impressively and his death is almost as impressive as Fergie’s is enjoyable. Bit emotionally campy at points but otherwise fun film.

The Day After Tomorrow

Film that prompted Mayans to predict the catastrophic film, 2012, and from the same director. Shameless pseudo-environmentalist scare film features malevolent window-shattering ice, tanker wall-scaling digital wolves, and the now literally washed up Dennis Quaid. Amidst the unintentional hilarity are bits of unfunny cleverness, involving Mexican border-crossing and librarian book-burning.

Three Kings

Brilliantly comedic serious film beginning with disclaimer that stylistic decisions were intentional. Shifts tone perfectly as Clooney, Wahlberg, and random supporting cast realize gravity of their situation. Sends great message amidst laughs galore. All around excellence helped by Jamie Kennedy, Adaptation’s director, Ice Cube, and two hidden Arrested Development stars.

Strangers on a Train

Another splendid Hitchcock movie featuring phenomenal last performance of Robert Walker. Builds Se7en-esque suspense with an equally demented character but culminates in a disappointingly juvenile plot twist, and fairground fight. Exceptional cinematography with notably deep focus makes up for a few editorial excesses, unless of course you’re a tennis fan.

30 Days of Night

Dark, stylized, and loyal graphic novel adaptation. Great performances by Hartnett and George are overshadowed by the fantastically creepy Foster, and out-of-place Huston, not to mention excessive attention to vampire faces. Scariest vampires yet despite silly fast motion seizure-feeding. Well executed action makes up for vampire pacing logic issues. Graaahhhhh!

Capitalism: A Love Story

One Moore crockumentary from the Democratic Limbaugh. This time he makes some legitimate points but again manages to brutally undercut his integrity with shameless editorial manipulation and dependence on emotional pleas. Further hurt by self-indulgent begging for billions and CEO arrest scenes. And the presence of a legitimate actor… Inconceivable!

This Film Not Yet Rated

Dick refuses to be censored in this disturbing look at the MPAA. Adequately covers full array of related subjects, from history to controversy to masturbation, but shoots itself in the foot with painfully incompetent private investigators and journalistically disappointing phone call recreations. Ironically undeserving of the NC-17 it got branded.

Role Models

Hybrid of Apatow and Phillips comedic styles puts Rudd alongside Stifler in his first decent Role since Pie. Generally funny with humor stemming from endearing irreverence. Succeeds at building emotional connections but also forsakes them in favor of gotcha jokes. Fairly satisfying plot gets a bit too fantastical towards end.

Brief Interviews with Hideous Men

Krasinski directs scatter-brained male perspective on female perspective on minds of men. Equal parts disorienting and unsatisfying randomness and ingeniously edited intercut conversation montages. Performances are all-around satisfactory but not impressive with exception of MacGruber’s strange serious turn and Dominic Cooper’s brilliantly dark argument. Excellent monologues galore tied together poorly.

Kick-Ass

Watchmen’s Zombieland with matching angsty, redundant voiceover. Bright colors and cleverly Layer-Caked transitions add nice touch to poorly paced but generally enjoyable film. Nick Cage perfectly paired with best female superhero yet, and their violence is beautiful to behold. Features hallway fight to rival Oldboy but done by young girl.

Scott Pilgrim vs. The World

George Michael vs. Anne (Bland), Superman, and Human Torch in stylized masterpiece from Edgar ‘Shaun’ Wright. Cera gives depth to his usual character. Uses incredible stylization to compliment, not replace, content but periodically goes too far. Struggles to top opening fights and premature Evans introduction but still manages admirably. Epic!

Black Dynamite

This is the film that beat Planet Terror in track in high school in the 70s. Perfect homage to Blaxploitation genre. Avoids Rodriguez parody or Tarantino tedium. Jokes are consistently spot-on and direction of racism is impossible to pinpoint. Every aspect of film feels totally genuine, including Watchmen-outdoing nunchaku Nixon.

Planet Terror

Rodriguez succeeds where Tarantino fails with film that both pays homage to the genre and is enjoyable to watch. Missing reel gag is absolutely brilliant, as is casting of celebrities in terrible roles. The effects get better as they get worse, and the performances are brilliantly bad. Terrifically funny flick.

Death Proof

Tarantino realizes that people love his table talk, and seriously over-obliges to everyone’s dismay . Succeeds masterfully at creating an uninteresting and seemingly poorly made film. Closing car chase and reappearance of Russell are film’s saving graces, though it’s depressing that this is worse than many of his early films.

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (2009)

Beautifully shot foreign detective film featuring two master performances from actors who will likely break into the American scene soon. Like Lehane books/films focuses more on characters than story but both aspects hold their own. Early tangential rape scenes could have been omitted, but why not include them. Remake unnecessary.

Gladiator

Archetypal epic and honeymoon of Crowe-Scott marriage. Beautiful cinematography, impressive action, genuine performances, and brilliant script lend to creation of an excellent film. Moments of Baby Scott style editing detract mildly but not enough to mar this masterpiece. So inherently good, for once even Scott’s director’s cut couldn’t improve it.

The Invention of Lying

Gervais finds the screenwriting pot-of-gold with this brilliant high-concept premise and then tosses it in the crapper, with alarmingly unclever story. Toes line of controversy but avoids leaping into it and disappoints with a disappointingly (and literally) Deus Ex Machina conclusion. All-star comedic supporting cast cannot support this film enough.